Standoff on the number 6

oh, there's never a dull moment on London buses, no sirree. I was on a number 6 bus last week and the journey had proceeded from Aldwych, where I caught the bus, to Warwick Avenue without incident. Could it be that my journey home was going to pass without involving a violent altercation between passengers/passenger & the driver/the driver & another motorist/the bus & a wall?

well, clearly not. I had erected my London Lite in order to prevent any interaction with my fellow passengers (this may sound rude, but remember this is in London, and Londoners know that the buses normally contain at least one weirdo). So it took me a while to realise that the bus had been stopped for some time. In fact, the driver just turned the engine off! What was going on?

I ventured out from behind my newspaper to assess the passenger next to me, who thankfully showed little sign of being a freak (I'm all about the snap judgements), and enquired why we had stopped. She didn't know. Some unidentified person behind me revealed that it was because a woman had got on the bus who for whatever reason the driver did not want to be on the bus. The driver had told the woman to get off the bus. The woman had refused.

Standoff on the number 6! The mood on the upper deck of the bus became fractious rather quickly. About 2.45 seconds after the engine was switched off, shouts of "What the f*** is going on?" and "Just f***ing drive the bus!" started to filter down the stairs. This is clearly a testament to the patience of Londoners. The shouts were then followed by a stream of people down the stairs wanting to get off. The woman who was causing the fracas was still refusing to get off the bus, and the driver was still refusing to drive. He did, however, open the doors, and a tide of impatient passengers surged forth onto the august pavements of Little Venice.

I was still on the bus, being a) slightly less impatient b) curious and c) unwilling to desert my seat, which I had had to trample old ladies and children to get (only kidding - I restrict trampling to the able-bodied). A number of passengers started to lecture the woman, using a variety of language (ranging from the quite polite to the unmentionable). The woman held her ground. Passive-aggressive statements were made. ("SOME PEOPLE are SO SELFISH, there's a WHOLE BUS of people wanting to GO HOME who are STUCK HERE because one person won't GET OFF...").

Suddenly a keen-eyed passenger spotted that another number 6 had pulled up behind the stubbornly stationary one on which I was sitting (wow, could there be any more S's in that sentence?). The tide of people turned into a stampede as everyone attempted to get on the other bus, along with some opportunists who had not been on the first bus but definitely appreciated a chance to get on the new one free. The second driver, who clearly didn't have a clue what was going on, raised his eyes and hands to Heaven as the hordes poured on without explanation or swiping Oyster cards.

Unfortunately my elbows were not sharp enough to secure a seat on the new bus, which pulled away from the scene of the standoff. I wonder how long the bus waited there until she got off or the police came.